LOVELIGHT
magazine
*******
November
2008***Vol. 5, no. 11
*******
Managing Editors: Adamaria Francis and a franciscan taoist
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*****
Thanks, and public acknowledgment to, the following
contributors to this issue: Barbara
Baty, Jim Dwyer, Maureen Dwyer,
Pat Fields, Chris Finer, Mark Franzen, Mick Gallagher, and Michelle Spivey.
*****
*****
LOVELIGHT MAGAZINE: WHAT WE'RE ALL ABOUT
Lovelight
magazine is free, coming to your inboxscreen monthly, to announce the beauty of
Love! And we love to laugh!:) So, if you discover any good chuckles,
please send them along!:) But no
bigoted, prejudiced, scatological, geruntological, low-quality, or poor-taste
humor, please.
Still, life is not
all laughs. So, we hope also to share
pleasant and happy thoughts.
Lovelight wants to promote peace and harmony, all over the world, and to
aid you to feel good!:) If you are
working on any religious, psychological, or spiritual issues, we encourage you
to read the ezine, and to write to us at rmfrancis@juno.com
Also, if you come
across any wise or touching pieces, not copyrighted, fairly short, please share
them with us! Also welcome are
practical tips, short pieces on personal philosophies, interesting facts,
wordplays, and general spirituality (but no religion or "preachy"
dogma, please.:). We reserve the
right to make whatever changes we deem necessary or desirable before inclusion
in Lovelight.
A subscription
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This is
"light" reading. And it
is also great, fun reading. A
collection of magazines is produced once a year, in a single paperback book. We have published three volumes, and
this would make a sweet gift for a loved one. Happy reading!:)
*****
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Life is a great
big canvas; throw all the paint on
it you can.--Danny Kaye (1913-1987)
***
ItÕs never too
late to be who you might have been.--George Elliot (1819-1880)
***
Be kind, for
everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.--Plato (c. 427-347 BC)
***
Keep away from
people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you
feel that you, too, can become great.--Mark Twain (1835-1910)
***
Character is
doing whatÕs right when nobodyÕs looking.--J.C. Watts, Jr.
***
I would not
waste my life in friction when it could be turned into momentum. Frances Willard (1839-1898)
***
Three things in
human life are important: First is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind.--Henry
James (1843-1916)
***
The game of
life is the game of boomerangs.
Our thoughts, deeds, and words return to us sooner or later, with
astounding accuracy.--Florence Shinn (1871-1940)
***
When you reach
for the stars, you might not quite get one, but you wonÕt come up with a
handful of mud either.--Leo Burnett (1891-1971)
***
You take people
as far as they will go, not as far as you would like them to go. Jeanette Rankin (1880-1973)
***
IÕve always
tried to go a step past wherever people expected me to end up.--Beverly Sills
(1929-2007)
***
Help others get
ahead. You will always stand
taller with someone else on your shoulders. Bob Moawa
***
Cherish your
visions and your dreams, as they are the children of your soul, the blueprints
of your ultimate achievements.--Napoleon Hill (1883-1970)
***
The thing that
is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect, and
beginning the work of becoming yourself.--Anna Quindlen
***
Millions long
for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday
afternoon.--Susan Ertz (1894-1985)
***
Truce is better
than friction.--Charles Herguth
***
Some think itÕs
holding on that makes one strong; sometimes itÕs letting go.--Sylvia Robinson
***
Anger is the
only thing to put off till tomorrow.--Slovakian Proverb
***
ItÕs very hard
to take yourself too seriously when you look at the world from outer space.--Thomas
Mattingly
***
We cannot
direct the wind, but we can adjust
the sails.--Bertha Calloway
***
Worry is a
misuse of the imagination.--Dan Zadra
***
Only you can be
yourself. No one else is qualified
for the job.
***
There can be no
happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do.--Freya
Stark (1893-1993)
***
The truth is
that there is nothing noble in being "superior" to somebody
else. The only real nobility is in
being superior to your former self.
Whitney Young (1921-1971)
***
Life is like an
ever-shifting kaleidoscope-- a slight change, and all patterns alter. Sharon Salzberg
***
No matter what
youÕve done for yourself or for humanity, if you canÕt look back on having
given Love and attention to your own family, what have you really accomplished?--Lee
Iacocca
***
Keeping score
of old scores and scars, getting even and one-upping, always make you less than
you are.--Malcolm Forbes (1919-1990)
***
There are
spaces between our fingers so that another personÕs fingers can fill them in.
***
Be life long or
short, its completeness depends on what it was lived for.--David Jordan
(1851-1931)
***
The bitterest
tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.--Harriet
Stowe (1811-1896)
***
You cannot live
a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to
repay you.--John Wooden
***
A friend told
me that for each morning when we get up we have to decide whether we are going
to save or savor the world. I
donÕt think that is the decision.
ItÕs not an either/or, save or savor. We have to do both, save and savor the world.--Kate Clinton
***
Follow the
grain in your own wood.--Howard Thurman (1900-1981)
***
Never deprive
someone of hope; it might be all she has.--Jackson Brown
***
There is no
greater joy or greater reward than to make a fundamental difference in
someoneÕs life.--Mary Rose McGeady
***
The opportunity
for brotherhood presents itself every time you meet a human being.—Jane
Wyman (1917-2007)
***
Treat your
friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light. Jennie Churchill (1854-1921)
***
Only the
mediocre are always at their best.--Jean Giraudoux (1882-1944)
***
Challenge is a
dragon with a gift in its mouth. Tame
the dragon, and the gift is yours.
Noela Evans
*****
*****
SOME FASCINATING OBSERVATIONS,
sent in by Maureen Dwyer
I'm a little confused. Let me see
if I have this straight:
If you grow up in Hawaii, reared by your grandparents, you're "exotic"
or "different." Grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, you are somehow a "quintessential
American story," a "common person," and have the ability to
relate to everyone!
If your name is Barack, you're a "radical, unpatriotic Muslim." Name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, then, you're a maverick!
Graduate from Harvard law School, and you are "unstable." Attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, and you're "well-grounded"!
If you spend 3 years as a
brilliant community organizer, become the first black President of the Harvard
Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new
voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a
State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman
of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend 4 years in the
United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring
131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and
Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience. But if your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years on the city council
and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as
the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to
become the country's second highest ranking executive.
If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 beautiful
daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian. But if you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your
disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.
If you teach responsible, age
appropriate sexeducation, including the proper use of birthcontrol, you are
eroding the fiber of society. But if , while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no
other option in sexeducation in your state's school system while your
unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant , you're very responsible.
If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious
law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that
up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's. But if you're husband is nicknamed "First Dude," with at least
one DWI conviction and no college education, who didn't register to vote until
age
25 and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from
the USA, your family is extremely admirable.
*****
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MORE LAUGHS AND CHUCKLES: HUMORTHERAPY
THE MOPED, sent in by Mick Gallagher A man on a Moped, looking about 100 years old, pulls up next to a doctor at a street light. The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks, "What kind of car ya got there, sonny ?" The doctor replies, "A Ferrari GTO. It cost half a million dollars!" "That's a lot of money," he replies. "Why does it cost so much?" "Because this car can do up to 320 miles an hour!" states the doctor proudly. The Moped driver asks,"Mind if I take a look inside?" "No problem," replies the doc. So he pokes his head in the window and looks around.Then, sitting back on his Moped, he says, "That's a pretty nicecar, all right! But I'll stick with my Moped!" The light changes, so the doctor decides to show himjust what his car can do: He floors it , and within 3 seconds the speedometer reads 160 mph. Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rearview mirror. It seems to be getting closer . He slows down to see what it could be and suddenly WHOOOOSSSHHH ! Something whips by him going much faster. "What on earth could be going faster than my Ferrari ?" he asks himself. He presses harder on the accelerator and takes the Ferrari up to 250 mph. Then, up ahead of him, he sees that it's the man on the Moped. Amazed that the Moped could pass his Ferrari, He gives it more gas and passes the Moped at 275 mph. He was feeling pretty good until he lookedin his mirror and saw the man gaining on him again. Astounded by the speed of this moped, he floors the gas pedal and takes the Ferrari all the way up to 320 mph. Not ten seconds later, he sees the Moped bearing down on him again. The Ferrari is moving at its maximum speed, and there's nothing he can do. Suddenly, the Moped plows into the back of his Ferrari, demolishing the rear end. He stops and jumps out and unbelievably, the moped-man is still alive. He runs up to the banged-up guy and says, "I'm a doctor. Is there anything I can do for you ?" He whispers," You can unhook my suspenders from your side view mirror!"***
A POST-TURTLE,
sent in by Mick Gallagher
While suturing a cut on the hand of a Texas rancher whose
hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation.
Eventually the topic got around to
Sarah
Palin and her bid to be a heartbeat away from being
President. The rancher said, "Well, ya know, Palin is a post turtle."
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what
a post turtle
was.
The rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road
and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."
He saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain: "You
know she didn't get up there by herself, she doesn't belong up
there, she doesn't know what to do while she is up there,
and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put her up there to begin with."
***
A FABLE (OR NOT), sent in by Mark
Franzen
Once upon a man announced to the villagers of a tiny town
that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.
They, seeing that there were many monkeys started catching them. He bought thousands at $10 and, as
supply started to diminish, they stopped their effort. He next announced that he would
now buy monkeys at $20 each. They started catching monkeys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their
farms. The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so
scarce it was an effort to even find one!
He now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50 each! However, since he had
to go to the city, his assistant would buy on his behalf. In the absence
of the man, the assistant told the villagers: "Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man
has already collected.
I will sell them to you at $35 and when he returns, you can sell them to him
for $50 each."
They bought all the monkeys for
700 billion dollars.
They never saw the man or his assistant again, only lots and lots of
monkeys!
Now you have a better understanding of how the WALL STREET BAILOUT
PLAN WILL WORK !!!!
***
|
|
Life is a journey.
Roll Down the window and
enjoy the breeze.
***
THE LADIES AND THE
COP, sent in by Chris Finer
Waiting to catch speeders, a
state trooper saw a car puttering along at 22 mph. He thought, "This driver is as dangerous as
a speeder!" So he turned on
his flashing lights and pulled the driver over. He notices that there are five ladies - two in the front seat
and three in the back, wide-eyed and white as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, said, "Officer, I don't
understand. I was going the exact
speed limit. What seems to be the
problem?"
He explained that 22 was the route
number, not the speed limit. A bit
embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her
error.
He said, "Is everyone in this car
OK? These women seem awfully
shaken."
"Oh, they'll be all right in a
minute, officer. We just got off Route 127."
***
INVESTMENT TIPS FOR 2008, sent in by Maureen Dwyer
With all the turmoil in the
market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and Acquisition of Merrill Lynch
by Bank of America, this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next
expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG
bucks. Watch for these
consolidations later this year:
1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co.
Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.***2.) Polygram Records,
Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner
Cracker.***3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.***4. Zippo
Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa.***5.
FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.***6.
Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
Fairwell Honeychild.
*****
*****
BELIEVE!
sent in by Maureen Dwyer
Have a seat . . . Relax . . . And read this slowly .
I believe -
. . That just because two people
argue, it doesn't mean they don't love
each other. And just
because they don't argue, it
doesn't mean they do!***That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change. Remember that!***That no matter how good a friend is, she's going to hurt you every once in a while; and you must forgive
her for that. Even if you
think you can't.***That true
friendship continues to grow, even over
the longest distance. Same
goes for true love.***That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.***That
it's taking me a long time to become the
person I want to be.***That you should always leave loved ones with
loving words. It might be the last
time you see them!***That you can keep going long after you think you can't.***That we are responsible for
what we do, no matter how we feel.***That
either you control your attitude or it
controls you.***That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.***That money is a lousy way of keeping score.***That
my best friend and I can do anything or
nothing and have the best
time.***That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to
help you get back up.***That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be
angry, but that doesn't give me
the right to be cruel.***That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences
you've had and what you've learned
from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.***That it isn't always enough to be
forgiven by others. Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive
yourself.***That no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief.***That
our background and circumstances may have
influenced who we are, but
we are responsible for who we become.***That you shouldn't be so eager to find
out a secret. It could change your life forever.***Two
people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.***That your life can be changed
in a matter of hours by people who
don't even know you or by people whom you don't even know.***That even when you think you have no more to
give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the
strength to help.***That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.***That you should
send this to all of the people in whom you believe.
*****
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THE SEASONS OF
LIFE, sent in by Barbara Baty
There are seasons in your life in the same way that there
are seasons in nature. There are
times to cultivate and create, when you nurture your world and give birth to
new ideas and ventures. There are times of flourishing and abundance, when life
feels in full bloom, energized and expanding. And there are times of fruition, when things come to an end. They have reached their climax and must
be harvested before they begin to fade. And, finally, of course, there are times that are cold, and
cutting and empty, times when the spring of new beginnings seems like a distant
dream. Those rhythms in life are
natural events. They weave into
one another as day follows night, bringing, not messages of hope and fear, but
messages of how things are. If you
realize that each phase of your life is a natural occurrence, then you need not
be swayed by the changes in circumstances and mood that life brings. You find that you have an opportunity to
be fully in the world at all times and to show yourself as a brave and proud
individual in any situation.
--from Tibetan Buddhist writings
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COCOA MULCH,
sent in by Pat Fields
Even if you don't have a pet, please pass this to those who
do: One of our dog agility friends experienced a tragedy! The doting owner of two young lab mixes
purchased Cocoa
Mulch to use in her garden. She loved
the way it smelled and it was advertised to keep cats away from her garden. Her dog Calypso decided that the mulch
smelled good enough to eat and devoured a large helping. She vomited a few
times, but wasn't acting lethargic in any way.
The next day, this lady took Calypso out for her morning walk. Half way through, Calypso had a seizure
and died instantly. Although the
mulch had NO warnings, upon further investigation, it was discovered that this
product is HIGHLY toxic to dogs and cats.
Cocoa Mulch is manufactured by Hershey's, and they claim that, "It
is true that studies have shown that 50% of the dogs that eat Cocoa Mulch can
suffer physical harm to a variety of degrees (depending on each individual
dog). However, 98% of all dogs
won't eat it." This Snopes
site gives the following information:
http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/cocoamulch.asp
Cocoa Mulch, which is sold by Home
Depot, Foreman's Garden Supply, Target, and
other Garden supply stores, contains a lethal ingredient called 'theobromine.' It is lethal to dogs and cats. It smells like chocolate and it really
attracts dogs. They will ingest
this stuff and die. Just a word of
caution: Check what you are using
in your gardens and be aware of what your gardeners are using in your
gardens. Theobromine is in all
chocolate, especially dark or baker's chocolate which is toxic to dogs. Cocoa bean shells contain potentially
toxic quantities
of Theobromine, a xanthine compound similar in effects to caffeine and theophylline.
A dog that ingested a lethal quantity
of garden mulch made from cocoa-bean shells developed severe convulsions and
died 17 hours later. Analysis of
the stomach contents and the ingested cocoa-bean shells revealed the presence of
lethal amounts of Theobromine.
Please give this the widest distribution!
*****
*****
"MUST KNOW"
ABOUT 'STAR 77,' sent in by Michelle Spivey
It was about one p.m. And Lauren was driving. An UNMARKED police car pulled up
behind her and put his flashing lights on. Lauren's parents have always told her never to pull over for
an unmarked car, but rather to wait until they get to a gas station. Lauren had actually listened to her
parents' advice, and promptly called *77 to tell the police dispatcher that she
would not pull over right away. She
proceeded to tell the dispatcher that there was an unmarked police car with a
flashing red light on his rooftop behind her. The dispatcher checked to see if there were police cars near
where she was, and there weren't, and he told her to keep driving, remain calm,
and that he had back up already on the way. Ten minutes later, 4 cop cars surrounded her along with the
unmarked car behind her. One policeman
went to her side, and the others surrounded the car behind. They pulled the guy from the car and
tackled him. He was a convicted
rapist and wanted for other crimes, including previously having impersonated an
officer.
I never knew about the*77 Cell Phone feature, but especially for a woman
alone in a car, you should never pull over for an unmarked car. Apparently, police have to respect your
right to keep going to a safe &quiet place. You obviously need to make some signals that you acknowledge
the police-- (I.e., put on your hazard lights) or call *77 like Lauren
did. Too bad the cell phone
companies don't generally give you this little bit of wonderful information.
*Speaking to a service representative at BellSouth Mobility
confirmed that *77 was a direct link to state trooper info in all states. So, now it's your turn to let your
friends know about *77.
*****
*****
PROTECTING YOUR
IDENTITY, sent in by Barbara Baty
The
Sherlock Holmes Guide to Recovering Your Stolen Identity
Article by Zen Habits contributor Jonathan
Mead.
As technology rapidly increases,
and the information age expands, our identities are at an increasing risk for
being stolen. But itÕs not a
hacker trying to steal your social security number that should be causing you
to lose sleep. ItÕs the ownership
of your mind thatÕs at stake.
Most of us work at boring jobs,
doing the same ol' thing, day in and day out. WeÕre trying to liberate ourselves from these dead-end
pursuits (thatÕs why youÕre here right?) but itÕs not always easy.
The answer society has given us is
to buy more things:
The answer weÕre given is not a
change of attitude or perspective, but a product. What theyÕre really saying is: ÒIf you have this thing youÕll
finally live up to the image of who you think you should be, or rather, who we
think you should be.Ó
This might sound a bit extreme. Most of us canÕt imagine that weÕre
living a lie and that stuff is ruling our lives. ThatÕs only because weÕve been so brilliantly duped [or
brainwashed].
I, personally, have defined myself by
my stuff. Who hasnÕt? IÕve thought that as soon as I get this
car, this job, these clothes and this image, IÕll finally be somebody. But as soon as I get that stuff, as soon
as I feel that my image is complete, IÕm on to the next thing. I need an upgrade. IÕm in search of the
next thing to make me feel better.
The battle for your authenticity is
not an easy one, but there are some things you can do to get started on the
road to recovering your stolen identity.
So, you want to recover your stolen
mind? IÕve enlisted the help of
Master Detective Sherlock Holmes to help guide us on our search.
1. Accept that your identity is in
jeopardy.
ÒYou do occasionally find a carrion
crow among the eagles.Ó-- Sherlock Holmes
The first step on the path to
recovering your true self is accepting that your identity is in jeopardy. You might be living a lie. That doesnÕt mean that your whole life
has been a fraud (see: how
to not sell out). This isnÕt black and white. There will probably be a lot of grey
area in between. The first step is
to realize that the socially acceptable path to "success" might not
be your path. Compromise is okay, but
not at the expense of your Soul. A
partially free mind is just not acceptable. [A "partially free" mind is in slavery.]
2. Authenticity isnÕt easy.
ÒIt was easier to know it than to
explain why I know it. If you were
asked to prove that two and two made four, you might find some difficulty, and
yet you are quite sure of the fact.Ó-- Sherlock Holmes
The battle for your authenticity
can be an ugly one. Your ego might
get hurt in the process. It
probably wonÕt feel very good if you own up to the fact that youÕve been lying
to yourself for a while about who you really are or want to be. The fact is, authenticity isnÕt easy. But itÕs worth it.
3. Find the thief.
ÒWe are spies in an enemyÕs
country.Ò-- Sherlock Holmes
Do some digging around. Put on your detective cap and start looking
for clues. Sometimes the culprit
will have left obvious tracks and his work will be downright clumsy. This is usually obvious when thereÕs
strong emotional resistance. Maybe
you donÕt want to be a lawyer, but youÕre pushing yourself through law school
because youÕve always been told you are really good at making arguments. This is a sure sign that your
authenticity has been broken.
4. Be wary of the stealthy crook.
ÒThese are much deeper waters than
I had thought.Ó-- Sherlock Holmes
There will be times where your
compromised identity is not seen in plain sight. It will take some serious work to uncover the genesis of this
offense. Perhaps youÕre trying to
read a lot of ÒhipÓ books to make yourself seem cool. You really donÕt care for the words on
these pages; you just want them on your bookshelf to show off when friends come
over. Maybe you donÕt really care
for wine, but you drink it any way because all your friends do too. You donÕt want to be left out,
right? Be wary of the times when
it seems like a small compromise isnÕt much. A small lie to yourself is like a little tumor in your
authenticity. Unless you remove it
before itÕs too late, it can easily grow out of control.
5. Follow the clues back to the
source.
ÒWhen once your point of view is
changed, the very thing which was so damning becomes a clue to the truth.Ó--
Sherlock Holmes
Once youÕve discovered the scene of
the crime, you have to trace the steps back to the source of the problem. You have to start thinking about a
motive. What caused your
authenticity to be compromised? Were
you trying to live up to an image of "perfection" in your mind? Were you afraid of not fitting in
because you were an outcast in high school? ItÕs time to face up to the facts.
6. Start over.
ÒFor once you have fallen low. Let us see in the future how high you
can rise.Ó-- Sherlock Holmes
Now that youÕve uncovered the
culprit and found the source of your problem, itÕs time to press the reset
button. Forgive yourself for not
having been perfect. Realize that
itÕs okay to not be as cool as you think you are. Choose freedom over living up to some kind of lifestyle. Choose acceptance over chasing some idea
of what other people think you should be. If other people donÕt accept that, maybe itÕs time to say so
long to them.
7. Protect yourself.
ÒOne drawback of an active mind is
that one can always conceive alternate explanations which would make our scent
a false one.Ó-- Sherlock Holmes
The final step to recovering your
authenticity is to protect yourself from the creation of falsehood's happening
again in the future. This might
mean making a pact to be true to yourself, before anything else. It might mean that you cut down on media
consumption. You stop watching TV
and reading magazines (or at least do so selectively). You stop listening to people tell you
what they think you should be.
There will obviously be times when
we will still do things to fit in. WeÕll probably act differently around our mother than we
would around our drinking buddies. ThatÕs okay.
In order to protect your identity from being stolen, stop
chasing some idea of what you think you should be, but youÕre not.
*****
*****
PEOPLE WE WOULD
RATHER AVOID, sent in by Barbara Baty
Tricycle's Daily Dharma
People We'd Rather Avoid
Metta (lovingkindness, unreserved friendliness) is to be
extended towards all beings and all manifestations, yet most of our
difficulties lie with people. It
is much easier to love birds, dogs, cats, and trees than it is to love people. Trees and animals don't answer back, but
people do, so this is where our training commences. Sometimes people find they don't feel anything while
practicing metta meditation. That
is nothing to worry about; thoughts aimed often enough in the right direction
eventually produce the feelings. All
our sense contacts produce feelings. Thoughts are the sixth sense. And even if we are only thinking metta,
eventually the feeling will arise. It is one means of helping us to gain this heart quality, but
certainly not the only one. In our
daily activities, all of us are confronted with other people; and often, ]we
meet] with those whom we would rather avoid. These are our challenges, lessons, and tests. If we consider them in that manner, we
won't be so irritated by these experiences. When we realize that such a confrontation is exactly what we
need at that moment in order to overcome resistance and negativity and
substitute metta for those emotions, then we will be grateful for the
opportunity.
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NINE FAIL PROOF TIPS FOR EATING HEALTHY AT SOCIAL GATHERINGS, sent in by
Barbara Baty
I have to admit that while I eat
pretty healthy at home, my weakness is at social gatherings: family parties,
weddings, gatherings with friends, barbecues, eating out at restaurants.
IÕve tried different strategies,
with mixed success. So, before I
went out last night (for the FIFTH time in six nights!), I asked my friends on
Twitter (follow
me here) for some of their best tips on eating healthy at social
gatherings.
They responded with some great,
common-sense tips. While many of
these are tips IÕve tried before, itÕs good to be reminded of them. And a couple I havenÕt tried yet, so I
now have a good arsenal of strategies at my disposal.
I thought you might find these tips
useful.
Please note that some of these
might be a bit contradictory. You
should pick the tips that work best for you, and not look at this as a
step-by-step guide.
What are your strategies for eating
healthy (or not) when youÕre out at social gatherings? Please share in the comments.
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THE ATTITUDE OF
GRATITUDE: A GRACEFUL, GRATEFUL LIFE, from Zen Habits, sent in by Barbara
Baty
ÒIf the only prayer you said in your whole
life was, 'Thank you,' that would suffice.Ó--
Meister Eckhart (thirteeth century)
ItÕs amazing how one simple, positive action
can change so much!
One of these things is the realization of the
power of gratitude. It has made us
more positive persons. More
productive persons. Better achievers. Better husbands, fathers, sons, and
brothers. Happier persons. Not
perfect, but gratitude has made us better.
Can it change your life as well? It can be guaranteed! You might not get the exact same
benefits, but thereÕs no doubt that the simple act of gratitude on a regular
basis will change anyoneÕs life, positively and immediately. How many other changes can claim to be
that quick, that easy, and that profound?
LetÕs take a look at some of the ways you can
incorporate gratitude into your life, and how it will change your life. These are just some examples, and not
all will apply to your life. But
pick and choose the ones you think will work for you.
1. Have a morning gratitude session. Take one minute in the morning (make it
a daily ritual) to think of the people who have done something nice for you, to
think of all the things in your life for which you are grateful. You wonÕt get to everything in one minute,
but itÕs enough. And it will instantly make your day better. Can you think of a better use of one
minute?
2. When youÕre having a hard day É make
a gratitude list. We all have those
bad days sometimes. We are
stressed out from work. We get
yelled at by someone. We lose a
loved one. We hurt a loved one. We
lose a contract or do poorly on a project. One of the things that can make a bad day much better is
making a list of all the things for which you are thankful. There are always things to be thankful
for — loved ones, health, having a job, having a roof over your head and
clothes on your back, life itself.
3. Instead of getting mad at someone,
show gratitude. ThatÕs a major
switching of attitudes — actually a complete flip. And so this isnÕt always easy to do. But itÕs a great thing to do. If you get mad at your co-worker, for
example, because of something he or she did É bite your tongue and donÕt react
in anger. Instead, take some deep
breaths, calm down, and try to think of reasons youÕre grateful for that
person. Has she done anything nice
for you? Has she ever done a good
job? Find something, anything,
even if itÕs difficult. Focus on
those things that make you grateful. It will slowly change your mood. And if you get in a good enough mood, show your gratitude to
that person. It will improve your
mood, your relationship, and help make things better. After showing gratitude, you can ask for
a favor— can she please refrain from shredding your important documents
in the future? And in the context
of your gratitude, such a favor isnÕt such a hard thing for her to grant.
4. Instead of criticizing your
significant other, show gratitude. This is basically the same as the above tactic, but gratitude
can transform a marriage or relationship. If you constantly criticize your spouse, your marriage will
slowly deteriorate. ItÕs important
to be able to talk out problems, but no one likes to be criticized all the
time. Instead, when you find
yourself feeling the urge to criticize, stop and take a deep breath. Calm down, and think about all the
reasons youÕre grateful for your spouse. Then share that gratitude, as soon as possible. Your
relationship will become stronger. Your spouse will learn from your example — especially
if you do this all the time. Your
love will grow, and all will be right in the world.
5. Instead of complaining about your
kids, be grateful for them. Many parents get frustrated with their children. They are too slow to do things, they
have a bad attitude, they canÕt clean up after themselves, and they pick their
noses too much. Unfortunately,
sometimes parents will communicate frustration to their children too often. And the kids will begin to feel bad
about themselves. Many parents
have done this. But thereÕs a
better way: follow the method of calming down when youÕre frustrated, and
thinking of reasons youÕre grateful to your child. Share these reasons with your child. And then take the opportunity to teach her,
instead of criticizing her.
6. When you face a major challenge, be
grateful for it. Many people will
see something difficult as a bad thing. If something goes wrong, itÕs a reason to complain, itÕs a
time of selfpity. That wonÕt get you anywhere. Instead, learn to be grateful for the challenge — itÕs
an opportunity to grow, to learn, to get better at something. This will transform you from a
complainer into a positive person who only continues to improve. People will like you better and youÕll
improve your career.
7. When you suffer a tragedy, be
grateful for the life you still have. My children recently lost a grandmother. These tragedies can be crippling if you
let them overcome you. You should
grieve. Of course you should. You can also take away something even
greater from these tragedies: gratitude for the life you still have. Appreciation for the fleeting beauty of
life itself. Love for the people
who are still in your life. Take
this opportunity to show appreciation to these people, and to enjoy life while
you can.
8. Instead of looking at what you donÕt
have, look at what you do have. Have you ever looked around you and bemoaned how little you
have? How the place where you live
isnÕt your dream house, or the car you drive isnÕt as nice as youÕd like, or
your peers have cooler gadgets or better jobs? If so, thatÕs an opportunity to be grateful for what you
already have. ItÕs easy to forget
that there are billions of people worse off than you — who donÕt have
much in the way of shelter or clothes, who donÕt own a car and never will, who
donÕt own a gadget or even know what one is, who donÕt have a job at all or
only have very menial, miserable jobs in sweatshop conditions. ]Many do not get one square meal a day;
most do not have access to clean drinking-water. A billion people live on one dollar a day, and two
billion—one out of every three—live on two dollars a day.] Compare
your life to these peopleÕs lives, and be grateful for the life you have. And
realize that itÕs already more than enough, that happiness is not a destination
— itÕs already here.
ÒEveryday, think as you wake up, "Today
is fortunate because I am alive. This is a precious human life. All energies are going to be used to
aid other living creatures, to develop and grow, to expand the heart out to others, to discover enlightenment
for the benefit of all beings. Kind
thoughts will continually be felt for, sent to, others. Getting angry or thinking badly about
others is out of the question, and the mind is cleared from all this kind of
thinking. Every benefit and blessing
will be given to all others."
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AQUARIUSCIIENCE: THE FUTURE IS NOW! Discoveries and inventions described in
the Kurzweil Science Newsletter:
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Smart Insulin
Technology Review Oct. 30, 2008
*************************
SmartCells has developed an
injectable drug called SmartInsulin
that senses high glucose levels and
automatically dispenses insulin on
demand. As glucose levels drop off,
the drug stabilizes, trapping
insulin until the next glucose
spike. Such a drug may cut down the
number of insulin injections
required to once a day and reduce
the risk of...
http://www.kurzweilai.net/email/newsRedirect.html?newsID=9633&m=40083
*************************
Voyage of the Bacteria Bots
Technology Review Oct. 31, 2008
*************************
Researchers at the Ecole
Polytechnique de Montreal have
coupled live, swimming bacteria to
150-nanometer beads to develop a
self-propelling "nanobot" device
steered through the body using
magnetic resonance imaging (MRI).
(The NanoRobotics Laboratory, Ecole
Polytechnique de Montreal) The
bacteria swim at 200 microns/second
using tiny...
http://www.kurzweilai.net/email/newsRedirect.html?newsID=9632&m=40083
KURZWEILAI.NET NEWSLETTER
*************************
Nanoparticles Target Multiple
Cancer Genes, Shrink Tumors More
Effectively
PhysOrg.com Oct. 28, 2008
*************************
Nanoparticles filled with small
interfering RNA (siRNA) molecules
targeting two genes that trigger
melanoma have shown that they can
inhibit the development of melanoma,
the most dangerous type of skin
cancer, while leaving healthy tissue
alone, Penn State College of
Medicine researchers have found....
http://www.kurzweilai.net/email/newsRedirect.html?newsID=9624&m=40083
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